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What's New:

  • I will be doing a webinar on Wednesday, October 3rd. The topic will be 5 Red Flags That You Are In A Destructive Relationship. You can register here.
  • The 2018 Conquer Conference: Be Brave, Grow Strong tickets are here. This live event happening October 2018, will be amazing. You can click here for more information. Get your tickets before prices go up on October 1st!
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Embracing Your Identity

By Tasha M. Scott

Did you know that my legal name is not really Tasha?

Nope.

Actually, my birth name is LaTarsha Yolanda McDonald. When I was younger, I would cringe when they would call my name: LaTarsha. I admit I was embarrassed by my first and last name. One because I didn’t want to be associated with Ronald McDonald - who was everywhere back in the day; and two, the R always brought questions. I just started telling people that the R is silent. (psst...Don’t judge me…lol)

This only seemed to be an issue every year on the first day of school and at the awards assemblies when they call your name. Every other time, people simply addressed me as Tasha.

Of course, when I got married, my last name changed to Scott. So then I became Tasha Scott. But after Googling myself, I saw that Tasha Scott is actually a pretty common name. I found out there is an actress and a lawyer named Tasha Scott, amongst others. My husband even has a niece named Tasha Scott. So I decided to add the M and became: Tasha M. Scott.

That’s a lot of work that goes into a name…whew!!

Recently at a women’s retreat, I had a one-on-one conversation with someone about my name. I don’t know how my legal name came up but she said, “I LOVE your name. It’s unique."

Right then…I had a light-bulb moment.

I spent the first part of my life feeling ashamed of my name/identity; the second part of my young life trying to be someone else…only to discover that I’ve been this unique individual the whole time.

I’ve always been her, I just didn’t own it yet. (See my earlier article, “Will I ever be her?”)

The question that screams louder though is Why did I spend so much time trying to hide me? My name is everything. My name defines me.

When I looked up the meaning of LaTarsha, I discovered that the root of the word means: Gift. This is what I found in my online research:

WHAT DOES NAME "LATARSHA" MEAN

“You always bring to completion anything you start. You are generous but like to see returns from your giving. You have an executive ability, you are a leader. You are moral, balanced, honest and intellectual, and you may attain spirituality. You are wise and practical with an appreciation of beauty. You always think before you act.You are bold, independent, inquisitive and interested in research. You know what you want and why you want it.

Position and social status is very important for you and you are always looking for way to improve your position in society. You have power and ability to chose your own destiny and achieve anything you want in life. You can expand in any direction according to your will and the set of values. You have passion for justice and belong to the position of authority. You have an inherent courage and endurance to accomplish “The Impossible Dream”. With the power comes responsibility. You hold keys to the material world, but with this gift comes high spiritual responsibility to be fair and true to others. You are philosophical and mature, determined and intense with a desire to endure, often religious.”

http://www.sevenreflections.com/name/latarsha/

Wow! I had to let that sink in.

I am a gift.

Not just any gift…God’s gift to the world.

I AM the manifestation of God’s purpose.

But I’ve spent years being ashamed and/or trying to hide my identity. I tried to hide me: the gift. It wasn’t until I was at the retreat, standing there talking to a stranger, that it donned on me. I need to stop hiding parts of me and fully embrace my God-given identity so I can fulfill my true purpose.

(Don’t you just love A-ha moments on the journey).

I was born to stand out and so were you!!! Have you been guilty of trying to downplay something about you because you didn’t want to be seen for who you are?

I love what Paul says when he reminds us, “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so that we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10

The truth is: Our identity is connected to our purpose. Owning our God-given identity paves the way for us to embrace our God-given purpose and potential. Here’s more food for thought. The next time you have a temptation to apologize for your unique identity, get to the root of the issue and ask yourself, “Why am I hiding?"

A greater question that looms is, "What could I accomplish if I stopped hiding? Who could I become with no limitations?"

My friend, let’s make a deal: From this day forward, we’ll stop hiding. We’ll stop apologizing. We’ll embrace our God-given identities so that we can fulfill our God-given purpose and potential in life!

Are you in?

My friend...You are Necessary, Be you!!

I hope to meet many of you at the 2018 CONQUER Conference in Lincoln, Nebraska October 12, 13.

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Maximize Your Existence

by Tasha M. Scott

Are you being held hostage by your past? Do you have limiting beliefs that keep you stuck - ever-reaching but never attaining the dreams you long to see fulfilled?

Tasha Scott can relate. She launched out in business with drive, determination and enthusiasm. She had big dreams, but she discovered it takes more than a dream to succeed in life and business. She had to deal with issues from her past that were holding her hostage, learn to surrender to her true source of power and unleash her God-given potential to live a life of purpose and significance.

Like Tasha, you can overcome limiting beliefs and live an intentional life of significance. Learn how to turn your painful past into a platform of powerful presence.

In Maximize Your Existence, Tasha shares ten principles she has learned to help you get unstuck and become the powerful woman God created you to be.

Two winners will be selected in our next newsletter.

If you would like to enter to win, you can click here to provide name and email address.

The winners of "Taking Out Your Emotional Trash" by Georgia Shaffer are Lane F and Kathy K.


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Upcoming Events


September 28th and 29th
AACC
Conference Dallas, TX

October 12th and 13th
Conquer Conference
Lincoln,Nebraska
Leslievernick.com/conquerconference

October 26th and 27th
1st Baptist Church
Houna, LA

November 2nd and 3rd
AACC New Life Summit
Charlotte, North Carolina http://charlotte.cmhcsummit.com/

Want to have Leslie speak at your event? Click here to find out more information.


How Do I Stop Repeating the Same Cycle?

Question: I have recently left my husband of 26 years again for the 4th time in 4 years, due to the domestic violence. Each time I leave, he “finds God,” repents, and I fall back in again. Each time I come back home after leaving for a 4 month period, usually from a domestic violence shelter, it only takes 2 weeks of going to church and praying, then it is back again.

He is very angry, always angry with everything I do. It is never enough or good enough. The physical violence has lessened up in the past 4 years. More just pushing me up against walls or throwing things at me. The control, name-calling, accusations, and calling me crazy have increased.

Anyhow, I have recently left again for the 5th time and it has been 3 months. He has again, “found God.” I am so torn, I have no proof that he has ever had an affair, however, I cannot find any scripture that it is ok to leave for abusive reasons.

He uses it to get me to come back home, then changes back again. I get confused if it may be a real change this time. Any advice? I have been a Christian all of my life and try harder and harder to make our marriage peaceful and happy, but cannot ever please him. This last time before I left him, I tried to commit suicide, but he came home early that day and took me down from the rope. I began feeling the only way out is death. Now, being away from him, I realize that is not the case, thank God, but I have to obey God, and do not know what to do?

I trust God and feel he has made so many ways for me to escape this marriage, but I continue to go back each time. I cannot live that way anymore, but do not know what to do. Any help you can offer would be so appreciated. I love my husband, and I love my Lord God. Thank you, Leslie!

Answer: You are not alone. Sadly many women find it hard to stay separated or initiate a divorce from their destructive/abusive spouse. There are a variety of reasons, but the top two I hear most often are economic (feeling like you can’t make it on your own) and spiritual (God hates divorce or he wants you to suffer for him).

I want to challenge something that your husband says. Despite your husband’s words, he has not found God. There is nothing in your description of his behavior that indicates any of the fruit of repentance or the fruit of the Spirit that the Bible says are characteristic of a true believer or a changed life (Galatians 5:22,23; Matthew 3:8).

Here is What People Saying About Our Conquer Conference

The Conquer Conference was the highlight of my year. I was in the thick of a messy divorce, and I had just lost my church friends because of their belief that divorce is always wrong. I found some local women who were also going, and we flew from Minnesota to PA together, bonding in a special way during our trip as well as during the conference. Just being in that large auditorium with women who had experienced similar marital distress was like a healing balm. The messages in the main sessions and the workshops were practical and inspirational. Everything was dripping with love and compassion, and we all just ate it up like starvation victims. I’ve been looking forward to the next Conquer Conference for a long time, and I’m inviting everyone I know to take advantage of this opportunity to get some tender loving care and wisdom for their healing journey.

– Natalie H.

LESLIE WELCOMES YOUR QUESTIONS

Leslie wants to help you grow in your personal and relational effectiveness. Please submit your questions by clicking here.

Then, visit Leslie's Blog as she posts her responses to one question per week.

Note: Due to the volume of questions that Leslie receives, she is unable to respond to every question.

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Leslie Vernick PO Box 5312 Sun City West, Arizona 85376 United States