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The Good That Is Never Good Enough

By Leslie Vernick

Have you ever seen a verse in the Bible for the first time – one that you were sure you never noticed before, even though it is underlined in your Bible?

That’s what happened to me recently, and I can’t stop thinking about it. Paul prays for the Philippians. He said“..that your love would abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be able to be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness, that comes through Jesus Christ – to the glory of God” (Philippians 1:9-11)

I usually have no problem figuring out the difference between good things and bad things, but Paul prays for something greater. He prays that we would learn to discern between the better things and the best things. That is a whole lot trickier. There have been times in my life where the good things have distracted me from pursuing the best things. Other times I was so busy enjoying the good things, I got lulled into a false belief that they were the best things.

Mary of Bethany is a woman who learned to discern the best thing. She chose to spend her time loving Jesus; her sister Martha chose serving Jesus. I used to think of the Mary and Martha story as an illustration of personality differences. Martha was a worker, Mary, a listener, but I’m more convinced than ever that it wasn’t a matter of personality but of discernment. Mary’s love for Jesus taught her how to see what the best things were at the moment. Whether sitting at his feet in rapt attention or spilling her treasured perfume over her Savior’s tired and callused feet, Jesus said Mary made the right choice.

To be honest, in the busyness of ministry, sometimes I fail to take that quiet time to sit at Jesus’ feet. I struggle to be still, simply love Him, learn from Him and allow Him to fill me with His love. I’m so busy doing things for Jesus, I am not taking the time to be with Jesus.

I know I’m not alone. I work with many women who feel too busy to take time to be alone with Jesus. Multiple priorities, ministry responsibilities, a hectic home life and people constantly tugging for something, keep them lost in the good that is not good enough.

Oswald Chambers writes, “The great struggle in the life of faith is not sin but the good that is not good enough.” I don’t want to settle for the good and forsake the best God has for me. I hope you don’t either.

Book Giveaway

Guard Your Heart By Detaching
From Destructive People

By Susan King

Question: I understand that stonewalling is detrimental to a relationship – but honestly, I found it necessary. When my husband would criticize me, or yell at me the only way I could keep myself from responding in kind was to “stonewall” or emotionally detach from what was happening. I thought I was controlling my anger so that it wouldn’t be destructive to the relationship. What’s the alternative?

How do you “guard your heart?” What does that look like practically? I feel like the only way I know how to do that with my husband is to distance myself from him as much as possible but then that seems like the silent treatment. What does a healthy version of “guarding your heart” look like?

Answer: I appreciate your willingness to ask further questions about emotional detachment and guarding your heart. Often in my work with women who are in destructive relationships, I hear them describe self-protection as building a wall around the heart and avoiding interaction with the destructive person. While going ‘no contact’ may be a necessary form of finding safety, that is not always the case. When you have chosen for some form of relationship to continue, how can you manage healthy detachment and guard your heart biblically?

Continue Reading …

What People Are Saying About Leslie’s Walking in CORE Strength Coaching Group:

Thank you so very much for the encouragement and affirmation you have given each of us in the group. Put me in coach. I want to “play”. Actually, I want to keep working every day. I will miss your smiling face and all your props to help us get the concepts we are learning. The fact that I could confront some tough experiences by realizing I have feelings but they don’t have to have me. The fact that I could confront the issues is because I am worthy of speaking up for myself. I am worthy of respect and I can do both without being disrespectful to others.

LESLIE WELCOMES YOUR QUESTIONS

Leslie wants to help you grow in your personal and relational effectiveness. Please submit your questions by clicking here.

Then, visit Leslie’s Blog as she posts her responses to one question per week.

Note: Due to the volume of questions that Leslie receives, she is unable to respond to every question.