April 14th, 2015

What's New?

For All People Helpers: Leslie will be speaking at the Desire Conference, April 18th, and it will be held in Clarks Summit, PA.
Register Here.

FREE Webinar – Have you ever wanted to have a free session with Leslie? Here is your chance. Leslie is doing a free 60 minute Webinar on Wednesday, April 29th @ 7:30 PM ET. Click Here To Register.

Do You Know God Or Simply Know OF God?

By Leslie Vernick

I think much of my Christian life I have made a huge mistake. I focused on what to believe rather than how to believe. I learned the truth rather than lived the truth. I absorbed Christian doctrine, biblical principles, who Jesus was and what he did and I thought that was enough, but my knowledge didn’t change my heart or my character.

Did you know we can believe in something and still not know it?

The demons believed in Jesus (who he was) yet they did not know him (James 2:19, Mark 3:11, Luke 4:41).

We can believe in marriage and not know it (never been married).

We can believe in freedom and not know it (live in a communist country).

We can believe in Italy and not know it (never been there).

We can believe in forgiveness, or grace, or love, but not know it (experience it).

We can believe in God yet not know Him.

Jesus tells us, “This is eternal life, that they would know you.” (John 17:3)

Paul said, “I once thought these things (adherence to religious principles) were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord” (Philippians 3:7-10).

Paul prayed that we would know (experience) the love of God (Ephesians 3:19).

True faith is not in an idea or principle; faith is in a person. We can believe in God but still not believe Him. Satan knows more true things about God than we will ever know yet he does not believe him.

We can be biblically correct yet spiritually lost and empty.

Friend, it is God’s desire that you know him, not know about him. His desire is that you believe him, not merely believe in him. Let’s not confuse the two. Knowing God humbles you and it changes you. Paul says as a result of knowing him, we are to, “Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him” (Colossians 3;10).

Are you becoming more and more like Jesus? If not, perhaps it’s because although you believe in him, you still do not know him.

Stop Accepting “Non-Apology” Apologies

See Original Post

This week’s question: My husband has had two affairs, he throws things when he’s angry, abandons me for days at a time after an argument and now has just completely detached himself from our family. He also lies about his whereabouts. I want to be the wife God has called me to but I can’t continue this way. My husband always says he is sorry and will change but these behaviors continue to resurface. Please help.

Answer: I think the first question you must settle is what kind of wife do you think God wants you to be for your husband? Is it a wife that allows herself to be abused, abandoned, lied to, and cheated on with no consequences?

You say I can’t continue this way. I don’t blame you. No one would want to be married this way. But I think your dilemma is that although you can, with God’s help, be the wife that God wants you to be, that doesn’t guarantee that your husband will become the husband God wants him to be or that you want him to be.

But the question remains, what kind of wife do you think God wants you to be here? Do you think he wants you to be passive and continue to live with a man who lies to you, cheats on you, leaves you and scares you when he’s angry? Or, might God be calling you to love your husband in such a courageous way that you boldly confront his sinfulness, refuse to accept his excuses, and if he wants to remain married to you, require him to show that he’s repentant and truly wants to change.

His words are meaningless. He repeatedly lies. If he wants to be married, it’s time that he take specific and consistent actions steps that demonstrate that he’s serious and willing to work hard to change.

What might that look like? For starters he needs to get some accountability partners that will help him stay honest, engaged, and sexually faithful. He needs a plan to help him learn how to manage his emotions when he’s angry or hurt so he doesn’t get destructive, deceitful, or disengage for long periods of time.

Obviously he hasn’t been able to change these habits by himself so he will need to get professional or competent pastoral help to learn how to deal with his emotions and understand why he does the things he does. These changes do not happen quickly or painlessly, but with God’s help, are possible for the person who is committed and teachable.

I think you fear that if you hold your husband to these necessary changes and he refuses, then what? I’m going to tell you the unvarnished truth. Your relationship is broken. You may stay legally married, you may even still live together but you cannot have a good marriage if your husband will not change.

Here me. You can make a bad marriage better all by yourself (by not retaliating or repaying evil for evil), but you cannot make a bad marriage a good marriage all by yourself no matter how good a wife you are.

We only have to read through the book of Jeremiah to see how God longed for Israel to repent, to come to her senses and change, but she would not. God loved Israel, but He could not and would not have a close and intimate relationship with her until she was willing to change her sinful, adulterous, deceitful ways.

God knows what you’re going through. Let him empower you to be the wife he wants you to be and the wife your husband most desperately needs, which might be totally different than you think. You don’t have to live this way anymore.

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