Leslie Vernick- Christ-Centered Counseling
May 20, 2018 at 3:24 pm
1 Peter, not 1 Corinthians. 🙂
1 Peter 4:8 (NIV)
Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.
May 20, 2018 at 1:03 pm
I cant tell you how many times I used this thought process to justify staying in abuse. Thank you Leslie youre insight is priceless
October 14, 2017 at 4:41 pm
I appreciate learning HOW to speak the truth in love. It’s unfortunate, but I did not know HOW to speak the truth in love and I am still learning after being married 37 yrs. Leslie mentions accountably but sometimes we think we need to place it on the other person without having it ourselves. Like when it says in 1 Peter 3 “you have become her (Sarah’s) daughters if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear [that is, being respectful toward your husband but not giving in to intimidation, nor allowing yourself to be led into sin, nor to be harmed]. God’s Word is conditional. It says, “If” we (as wives) do what is right. It goes on to say first, do not be afraid of him. Respect him. Do not give in to him to bully you into sin. Do not allow him to hurt you. So HOW does a woman who possesses many emotions [herself] ever choose which healthy emotion in which to approach her husband with? This healthy emotion is needed in order to have a CONstructive conversation, relationship, marriage, and positive end result. Part of the curse under Adam and Eve is for wives to “desire the husband but he will rule over you”. But in Christ, we are delivered from the curse. Now husbands are called to lay down their lives and love them as Christ loves.
How do we both (husband and wife) get to that beautiful place in our relationship if we neither are following any instruction?
October 14, 2017 at 2:34 am
One of my Sisters In Christ shared this video with me.
This is definitely confirmation.
Thank you so much!
I would really love to sign up!
October 14, 2017 at 5:07 pm
To register go to leslievernick.com/conquersignup
October 13, 2017 at 2:24 pm
Excellent Leslie! Great video- Thanks for pointing us to this wealth of verses. Just what I needed to hear today! Thank-you!
October 13, 2017 at 2:00 pm
I just can’t understand why this simple biblical wisdom isn’t taught from the pulpits. If it were, I believe, there wouldn’t be such a marriage crisis within the Christian communities. This teaching would set crooked paths straight and hold men to better accountability.
October 13, 2017 at 1:24 pm
I would love to join Conquer, I am a 73 year old man who has been married to the same emotional abuser for 47 years. My life is a never ending stream of criticism, I stammer in fear. I have MS which is aggravated by the constant stress. May I join?
October 13, 2017 at 2:03 pm
Hi eric, Conquer is only for women. A great resource would be Chris Moles. http://www.chrismoles.org/
May 14, 2017 at 9:09 am
I am looking forward to conquer. I have been married for 39 years of which most of those he has been secret sex addict, alcoholic and I don’t know what else. He did completely confess 10 years ago and we have been in counseling ever since. He has made huge strides but my children who are grown don’t see what I see. I need help to see real truth. Is the repentance only to keep me or is it deep enough to extend in reuniting our whole family.
May 10, 2017 at 11:45 pm
My husband is an alcoholic and has disengaged from all family life. It has been this way for a few years. I try to talk with him about the issues but he puts all the blame entirely back on me. I have tried loving him and praying for him, but he continues to push me away. I asked him to go to counseling either with me or separately. But he continues to disengage. Now I have chosen to not communicate with him, which he doesn’t seem to mind. It’s as if we are roommates in the same house.
Is the next step separation from him?
Or is this a case of continuing to try and reach out to him with love?
May 10, 2017 at 6:44 pm
This just confirms what I am doing as I have separated from my husband.
I pray it will be a wake up call. But in the meantime, the distance has
brought peace, restored health and joy. I am being set free from these destructive patterns I have walked in for years! So excited about joining Conquer.
May 10, 2017 at 6:06 pm
First I know I am not perfect and probably hard to live with I am told. However, when I came to my husband what I see going on in our marriage-honestly I am so tired of speaking about this mess I have myself in. I have wanted to be heard and to be in communications with each other but the past is off limits and I am suppose to just be kind and intimate😝 I am is disgust every time we are together. My body suffocates with his mass on me. I have been here too long!
October 15, 2017 at 7:33 pm
I can deeply empathize with you. I have been told the same thing many, many times. I have chosen to continue to be kind, however, I chose to discontinue intimacy with him. I moved into the guest room and told him I will no longer be intimate with you. He said a lot of things in rebuttal to try to convince me that I should change my mind. I made this decision based on what was in my best interest. Going forward all of my decisions will be based on what is in my best interest. Trust yourself and stay strong.
May 10, 2017 at 1:40 pm
Hi. I would like to join Conquer. I think I need to. I want to thank you for all of the wisdom I have been gleaning from your videos and FB talks…and I did order and read your book Emotionally Destructive Marriage about a year ago. After 20 years of marriage and six children later, my Christian leader husband confessed to an 11-month affair which nearly did me in… That confession was in December of 2015. Since then, I have grown bunches and have been going through a metamorphosis…I guess I wonder if there is any hope for our marriage… He is about to graduate from a 2-year nursing program (an LPN through the Army seeking his RN)…and basically I have been asked to be patient…it’s difficult for him to deal with relational issues with the pressures of school. But during this time, his life is still quite “private,” he comes and goes at will, without any accountability to me, which means leaving some days “to study” and not returning until 2, 4, and 5 o’clock in the morning. He says he “doesn’t trust” me because I have talked to too many people – my mother, my pastors, counselors, good old friends…which, honestly, if he had reacted differently I would not have felt the need to talk to as many people as I did. He was refusing counseling, suggesting that we can and will need to work things out amongst ourselves anyway…but his hiding and secrecy only increased from the beginning. I believe that I can not trust him, and that I will not commit to “keeping our conversations between us” as he has said he will not open up to me until he can be sure that that’s what I will do, until he shows signs of repentance – no more hiding his schedule and being away from home at bed time, self-preserving, etc. So I feel hat perhaps we’re at an impasse…
October 15, 2017 at 7:28 pm
Trust yourself not him. He has proven himself untrustworthy. Join Conquer. Don’t be cut off from those that support you.
October 19, 2019 at 11:14 am
Point out to your husband that he opened your private, sexual life to an outsider through his affair and you do not trust him because this makes him untrustworthy. Men do not just share their bodies with these “affair partners” but also intimate knowledge of you and your sexuality. By all means, start a business or focus on a career because he doesn’t sound committed to change.
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